The Courage to Succeed: A True American Dream. -Book Series, Chapter 10

 

Chapter 10

“The struggle of life is one of our greatest blessings. It makes us patient, sensitive, and Godlike. It teaches us that although the world is a whole of suffering, it is also full of the overcoming of it. -Helen Keller

The struggles

Would you believe me if I told you that I’ve faced bullying more than once in my life? The first time was in second grade when a fellow student, for reasons I’ll never understand, tried to throw me off the balcony. It was a terrifying experience, but my mother didn’t hesitate; she immediately transferred me to a different school. I was so grateful for her quick decision, knowing she potentially saved me from becoming another tragic statistic. My mom wasn’t one to play around with when it came to protecting me, and I applaud her.

Years later, I encountered another bully while working as a receptionist. A girl in the office seemed to take pleasure in trying to embarrass me in front of others. However, that situation didn’t last long because I didn’t let it define me. I moved ahead in my career, while she probably remained stuck in the same place. The point is I inherited my mother’s generous heart, and I strive to live by her example. But I’ve noticed that people often mistake my kindness for weakness. They don’t realize that kindness is a strength I carry with me in all my interactions.

Learning to stand against injustice has been a crucial part of my journey. One of my greatest fears has always been the possibility of not being fair to others in my efforts to defend myself. I never want to cross the line into anger or rage, so I often choose silence. Some might see my silence as a sign that they can walk all over me, but that’s far from the truth. I listen and take in what’s happening, but I try not to let things spiral out of control. Ultimately, I believe good always prevails, even if it takes time.

There was a time when I was labeled an overachiever and told to tone it down because I was making other workers look bad. This experience taught me the importance of balance and understanding professionally. For instance, in my free time, I would clean some of the machines at the stress lab I used to work at, not because it was required but because I wanted to contribute to the team and maintain a positive work environment. My intention was always to help, not to outshine anyone.

These experiences have shaped me into the person I am today, someone who values kindness and understands the importance of standing up for oneself. I’ve learned to navigate the fine line between being generous and not letting others take advantage of me. Through it all, I’ve come to believe that while some may misunderstand kindness, it remains one of the most powerful tools to make the world a better place.

Adapting to a new culture and society was an incredibly challenging experience for me. I often felt like I was navigating a landscape where others found accepting me for who I was difficult. While some people could see and appreciate my genuine nature, others seemed confused by it, almost as if they thought there was something unusual or even suspicious about my kindness. My motives were being questioned simply because I was being myself—a naturally genuine and kind person.

This misunderstanding was particularly frustrating because, in my culture, being direct and honest is accepted and expected. However, my straightforwardness was sometimes perceived as blunt or overly assertive in this new environment. It starkly contrasted with the more subtle and reserved ways of communication I was now encountering. The irony was not lost when people began to compare my communication style to that of a New Yorker, known for their directness and no-nonsense attitude. This comparison highlighted how different my cultural background was from the one I was trying to integrate into.

Over time, I learned to modulate my approach, softening my directness while still holding onto the essence of who I am. I realized that while I could adapt to new social norms, I didn't have to lose my authenticity in the process. This adaptation journey wasn't just about fitting in; it was about finding a balance between staying true to myself and respecting the nuances of the culture I was becoming a part of.

I'm not one to shy away from crowds, but if given the chance, I would take the lead in bringing a "party" to life. I've often found myself in situations where the atmosphere was supposed to be celebratory, but it felt more like a gathering needing some serious energy. The question always popped into my head: Where's the music?

The answer to a dull gathering is simple—give me a speaker, a microphone, and some Wi-Fi, and I can transform the vibe completely. With those tools in hand, I can set the stage for an impromptu karaoke session. And, of course, I'd be the first to grab the mic and start singing. There's something about music that has the power to break the ice and bring people together, and once I start, it usually doesn't take long for others to join in. Little by little, the room is filled with laughter, singing, and a shared sense of joy.

It's not just about performing; it's about creating an atmosphere where everyone feels free to let loose and have fun. I enjoy seeing people relax, shake off their inhibitions, and truly engage in the moment. In those instances, it's like I'm not just animating a party—I'm helping to create memories that people will look back on with a smile.

For me, a celebration isn't just about being present; it's about making the most of every moment, and if I can help others do that, then the event becomes something extraordinary. Whether it's a quiet dinner that turns into a lively karaoke night or a planned event that needs a little spark to get going, I'm always ready to bring the energy and ensure that everyone leaves with a sense of having indeed celebrated.

Do you think I've encountered jealousy because of my enthusiasm and willingness to jump in and lead? Absolutely. The whispers and side glances are unmistakable. "Who does she think she is?" they seem to wonder. "Isn't she the new girl on the block?" Some people can't wrap their heads around the idea of someone new, like me, stepping up confidently, especially in social situations where others might hesitate. They think, "I wouldn't do that even if I had been here for a decade."

But that's the thing—I've never let being new or different hold me back. I take it if I see an opportunity to bring energy to a room, to spark joy or participation. That's just who I am. I have the courage and the power to get involved and make things happen; sometimes, that ruffles feathers. I can sense the negative vibes, hear the muttered comments, and feel the resistance from those who perhaps wish they had the same drive but, for whatever reason, choose to hold back.

It's important to note that only some of the feedback I receive is negative. Many people appreciate my efforts and enjoy the lively atmosphere I help create. However, some of the negative comments stand out. They can sting sometimes, especially from people who don't know or understand my origin; however, I choose to keep going, and that's my secret!

So, what do I do? I stay true to myself. I keep being genuine and bringing my whole self to whatever I do. As long as I'm not crossing any legal, moral, or ethical lines, I'm comfortable with who I am and my choices. I believe in authenticity, in showing up as the best version of myself, and I'm not about to let anyone's jealousy or criticism change that. Ultimately, I'd rather be true to who I am, even if it means facing a bit of negativity, than hold back and wonder what could have been. Now you know why I titled this book The Courage to Succeed, to me, it takes courage to succeed in life.